It was a cold dark night and I was trapped in an abandoned warehouse, I found a key and a card on a table in one of the rooms, so I started to think to myself”what are these for”. I turned on my phone to see if I could get any signal, nothing. The rain on the steel roof sounded like a fish creating bubbles. The wind making the trees hit against the side of the warehouse sounded like a snapping turtle. As I go into one of the offices I find a car magazine from 1998. Moreover I stated wondering why there was a massive box of magnets, this warehouse must be a movie set because there is a load of props e.g. A massive dinosaur. The sky started turning lighter, it was almost the morning.
Powered by our collective imagination
October 29, 2014 at 2:57 pm
Max,
You have used the given images well. I wonder what you have learned from this free writing exercise? I think you have shown setting well, trying to incorporate figurative language to help enhance the mood. Above all, your ideas are clear and your use of complex sentences helps the overall flow.
Targets:
1) It’s quite unusual to have an adverb like ‘moreover’ to begin a sentence within a piece of creative writing. Plan your vocabulary carefully, be sure it suits the character you have created.
2) Look at your figurative language, do these images suit the mood of your piece or tract from it? I would be interested in your thoughts.